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My second day in Cambodia was a whirlwind of emotion: excitement, happiness, sadness, amazement…it is difficult to distinguish where each emotion began and ended.  Today we visited the Toul Sleng Museum, the Choeung Ek Killing Fields, and the Russian Market, each having their own effects on me.

Katie and I started our day early since we fell asleep the night before at 8pm.  We both woke up at 5am and stayed in bed just resting and talking about the upcoming day´s events.  We greeted the day with a lovely breakfast at the hotel.  Eating breakfast outside on the veranda is the most beautiful thing.  It is a nice break from the heat, as it is cool and breezy.  The food is Westernized, I usually order a fried egg with bacon, toast with jam and butter, tea and a little Khmer tradition of fresh squeezed green mango juice.  Birds chirp and you watch the streets come alive.  Ahh it is just wonderful!  After breakfast, we went to a local market to pick up some food to keep in the room for the week.  It was a lot of fun being on the streets without John or Jason guiding us…we avoided the motorbikes and tuk tuks and watched the everyday life of the Cambodians.  The store was also cool to see.  There was surprisingly a lot of American foods, some really cheap and others really expensive.

When we got back to the hotel, Jonnie (our driver) began us on our day´s adventures (each as an entry below because really they deserve appropriate attention!)  At the end of the day we all ate at the cutest Thai resturant.  Complete with floor seating on a balcony, wine, and wonderful conversation about the day and our careers.  Beyond the cultural experience, it is so nice to talk to other professionals about my future career. This trip has opened my eyes to the possibilities of what an MFT can do and I cannot wait to jump in.  All my goals in life are changing just from this trip…still trying to internalize it all, but it is all so wonderful.

After dinner and turning away the countless men who go around asking, “Tuk tuk?” Katie and I went out for a drink.  Of course the drinks here, like everything else is so cheap!  We chatted about the day, our lives, the things to come…but most interesting was the night life that surrounded us.  The locals were closing up shop, monks were walking back to the monastery, Westerners wandered the streets….to me, it was in a way romantic, in a wildly adventurous way!  Really, if anyone has the chance to experience Cambodia…they should.  It is a completely different world and somehow I am falling in love with it all! 

Our first stop of the day was the Toul Sleng Museum.  Let me just say, going to this genocide museum has been the most influential museum of my life.  I have been to a ton of museums displaying injustice of people and dark histories, but this was a completely different experience.  

First, a little history (though I really suggest reading about the Cambodian genocide.  I was shocked I never heard about this in all my years in school, especially since it was so recent):  In 1975 the Khmer Rouge took over Phnom Phen and cleared the city, sending thousands of people to the jungle and small villages to survive on their own.  Others were taken prisoner to be interrogated or killed.  All higher educated people and the rich were killed.  People that wore glasses were killed.  Over two million people died by execution, starvation or disease from 1975 to 1979.  The Toul Sleng Museum was originally a high school in the middle of the city, but when Pol Pot took over, he turned it into S21, a interrogation and torture chamber.  The museum allows you to walk through S21 in its original state, making your experience that much more powerful.  If you want to know more about the Khmer Rouge and what happened, I am reading a wonderful book called First They Killed My Father by Loung Ung.  

Walking through S21, we first saw the tombs of the 14 people the Vietnamese found when they took over the place.  They displayed the rules of the camp along with some of the torture devices like the gallow that hung people upside down until they passed out and then were dunked in water until they gained consciousness.  The sad thing was that these soldiers were mostly children trained by the Khmer Rouge army.  

The first building was a three story area where they held the people down while they questioned them.  Blood stains and the original chains still stood in the rooms.  Standing in these classrooms where so many people died, was beyond powerful.  I felt the presence of those that died.  On top of that, in each room was a photo of each of the 14 people that they found in the room they were found in.  I was overwhelmed with emotion…it all seemed so unreal.

The next building were the holding cells.  On the first floor was pictures of all those that died.  Surprisingly, the Khmer Rouge documented their “work” so well, it was like it was all taken yesterday.  Vivid photos and accounts of what happened were in front of me.  I looked at those that died and how they died.  In addition, this building was covered in barbed wire, an intervention placed after people tried to kill themselves by jumping off the second and third floors.  The second and third floors had the holding cells.  Tiny stalls that these people stayed in, marked like livestock. I was hesitant to walk in a stall, seeing as these people were forced here while I could simply walk in and out.  However, I did stand in one, letting the door close behind me…small and dark, I felt horrible about the comments I have made about feeling claustrophobic in the past.  As I stood there, I imaged the pain and suffering of those that stood there too…I tried to imagine their lives and could not.  

In the last building, the museum displayed stories of those that had known the people in S21.  The accounts from friends and family were in front of us, their words so filled with trauma and sadness, it was hard to read.  Every Cambodian has a story to tell relating to this genocide.  The trauma is still being worked out today.  Many of the generation born after the genocide had to leave because they could not deal with the trauma that plagues the Cambodia people.

After the museum, we all grabbed a drink and small food across the street…none of us could stomach a full lunch after seeing that.  We talked about our experiences and thoughts, but then and even a few days later, I am still trying to internalize it all…trying to comprehend.  But I am not sure I can. I think it is going to take a while for me to really understand what I saw my second day in Cambodia.

After seeing the Toul Sleng Museum and getting a quick snack, we took a 20 minute drive to the Killing Fields.  Outside, there were several men begging, all of which had lost limbs, most likely from land mines.  It was so sad to turn them away, but you have to because if you give them money you are supporting someone else, not them.  They are most likely hired to beg or you are contributing to a dependent cycle of begging.  Either way, it is hard but a sad truth.

So we walk in, and instantly you see the main stupa, which is amazing.  A stupa is a monument like structure which usually one prays at or honors spirits or gods.  We hired a Cambodian guide to tell us the story of the Killing Fields.  He was a seemingly young man, though for me, it is hard to tell age here…the average lifespan of these people is 62 and most look smaller than they should be due to malnutrition.  He sat us down and told us the history, much of which we learned at the Toul Sleng Museum.  He then brought us to the stupa.  A beautiful structure, surrounded by incense and flowers, we took off our shoes to enter.  Inside the narrow pathway, you could see the 17 stories of bones that were excavated.  The first nine stories were all skulls, arranged by sex and age.  Seeing the bashed in skulls or ones with bullet holes, the same skulls that they dug up a mere 30 years ago…very powerful.  I love that the Cambodians let you feel their pain by seeing these things.  You really immerse yourself in their history by standing less than a few inches away from someone that died.  

We quietly exited to the fields.  Behind the stupa, were mass graves that continued for miles.  Huge pits in the ground that remained open, though now covered in grass while butterflies fluttered through.  It was eerily pretty with the green and the butterflies…the guide explained that hundreds of bodies were found in these graves.  There are many killing fields like this, however, Choeung Ek was the biggest.  One grave had over 450 bodies in it.  Another had only decapitated bodies.  They would kill the babies by smacking them against a certain tree that we saw because they believed these children would come for revenge, so it was better to kill them in front of their mothers.  Another tree there was the “magic tree” that emitted music so that the surrounding people could not hear the screams of those that were dying.  It was estimated that over 20,000 people were killed in Choeung Ek of the 2 million that died during the Khmer Rouge.  

The hardest part for me in this area was that bones and cloth and teeth were embedded in the ground we walked on still.  As you followed the path, you saw human bones and teeth and the clothes they wore under your shoes.  The death of so many people still untouched in the ground.  The guide told us that they stopped opening the graves and excavating the bones because they had enough evidence to convict the leaders (though these Khmer Rouge leaders are still not brought to justice).  And, he said, every year when the rainy season comes, more bones and clothes surface…it is a constant reminder of the pain these people experienced.  I couldn´t imagine to see my ancestors continually rise up from the dirt like that.  

From walking through the fields, we headed to the museum part of the fields where they explained the history a bit more and we watched a film about the Khmer Rouge, all emphasizing the terrible history of the Cambodian people. 

After a day of extreme emotions and eye opening experiences, the Russian Market was the perfect place to go to calm down and be silly for a bit.  It is a crazy labyrinth of a place with stands of anything and everything for shoppers to buy.  Prices are ridiculously low and bartering is not an unknown activity! 

The six of us wandered the stands, looking at the craftsmanship of the locals shop contents.  You cannot help but buy the wonders within the stands.  Sadly, I did not bring a ton of money that day to the market, so Katie, Maren and I made plans to come back at the end of our trip for gifts.  

I think the best part of the Russian Market though was talking with locals.  We asked about what the different Buddhas were, how to say some Khmer words like “Thank you” and “Hello”, and just asking them about their lives.  Little kids run through the market laughing, though very shy when you try to talk to them!  I saw so many cool things I want to buy there, so I cannot wait to go back! 

So intermittently I have computer access to write about my day, but no access to load up my photos quite yet.  The plan is write up as much as I can throughout the week and come back to load my photos on the appropriate entries.  

I have TONS of photos!  It is only day 3 and I am at over 350 pictures…it really is that amazing!

Point being, come back to see my pictures…they truly are breathtaking!

Despite my best efforts as a former Girl Scout to always be prepared…I was not prepared for my computer battery to die completely or for my computer adapter to burn out…so…I will have to do a MAJOR blogging session when I return to the United States as soon as my battery is replaced.

For now, I am recording my Cambodian adventures the old fashioned way: with pen and paper!

December 6th: My journey Cambodia was, in fact, a trip in it self.  Katie and I set off to LA around 9pm to stay at the parental’s house for the night in hopes that we would get a good night sleep and not be so rushed in the morning.  Well, it was pouring, making the two and half hour drive, normally a breeze, a nervous one.  Then we get to my house, only to realize that Katie left her passport at home in San Diego.  So instead of the nice sleep we planned for, we waited up for her lovely boyfriend and mom to drive it over.  Finally, the next morning, we were off to the airport.

Our first flight to Shanghai was a breeze, on the plane and off for 13 hours, which we spent most of our time sleeping or reading from our travel books, getting super excited about the days to come.  We landed, and were off on our next flight three hours later to Kunming, China.  When we landed, we were met with a ton of confusion by officials in China, claiming they did not know where Phnom Phen was…after about 20 nerve wracking minutes of listening to another  language, not knowing what was going on, just that they would not let us through, we were allowed to pick up our luggage and head to our next stop.  Unfortunately, our next stop did not take off for another 8 hours.  In effect, Katie and I got comfortable in a corner, thinking we would rest and sleep in the lobby until we could check in.  Unfortunately (again), the airport closed at 2am…our flight did not take off until 930am.  So, tired, cold and hungry, Katie and I had to set up camp outside the airport.  Thank goodness we “stole” some airline blankets because it was cold! Plus, sitting on marble-esque material for 4 hours is not fun.  Luckily, we did find ways to entertain ourselves to ignore the misery we were putting ourselves through: we read about Taylor and Jake’s new romance in US, we took turns dozing off, and we “chatted” (and by chatting, I mean signing) with some other foreign travelers.  It was fun trying to keep warm while taking pictures with these wonderful people.  One lady even offered me an extra jacket…so sweet!  Finally, at 6am the doors opened and we ran off to get our next boarding passes to Cambodia!!  Of course, when we get to the counter, they tell us that we have to make another stop in Namming to go through customs.  So we basically got on this small plane, flew for an hour, got off and went through customs, got back on the same plane, flew for three hours and finally landed in Cambodia a little over 24 hours from when we first started traveling! Longest trip ever!  However, once we were flying over the country, we knew it was worth it.

December 8th: Once we grabbed our visas and luggage, we were picked up by our driver Jonnie to take us to the hotel.  Let me say, we were exhausted, but once we were in our car and driving through the city, the excitement of the city was all we needed to perk up!  The city itself is obviously poor, but the mix of cultural monuments that look like they are made of gold and the dinky stands on the streets made an awesome contrast.  Motorcycles and cars do not seem to have any traffic patterns or rules.  A honk lets people know you are there and then you just go!  Most people drive motorbikes…with (what I saw) up to FIVE passengers.  Very few cars are on the road, but ones that are are a lot of Lexuses and Range Rovers (later finding out these are owned by the “mob” of Cambodia mostly…or the “upper class,” unless you are a driver like Jonnie).  Whizzing by people and motorbikes, we finally made it to the hotel.  The Anise Hotel, where I am staying, is beautiful. Family-owned, the people are so nice.  Our hotel is considered a high standard, five star hotel, with air-conditioning, internet and all your basic amenities…for a mere $42 a night, and yet the service is unbelievable.

After settling into our room for about 10 minutes, we get a call from Jason (on of the group leaders; John is the other and Katie and I are joined with two other people: Deb and Maureen) who wants us to join them all in an excursion to a local market.  We were still tired and hungry, but who could resist an outing after seeing it through a car window?  So we freshened up and headed down to meet everyone and head over to the market place.

We traveled via Tuk-Tuk, a motorize bike with a carriage attached for passengers.  Let me just say, traveling via car and seeing people on bikes and motorcycles not listen to any rules is something completely different from seeing it from a Tuk-Tuk.  It was scary and exciting, weaving in and out of the crowds!  Soon we were at the market and it was full of interesting things…and smells.  People sell all kinds of things from knock off designer brands to hanging meats to live crabs.  The food sections smells awful! Drying fish and meats, just skinned animals, fruits I have never seen….it truly is a sight and smell! However, despite the interesting things that surrounded us, Jason lead us right to the fried spiders.  Yes, fried spiders.  Which of course, you have to try.  And I definitely did!  Not as bad as expected, but the thought still creeped me out just the same and I could not finish it.  Locals laughed at us all while we took pictures and attempted to eat the spiders.  Oh and these were not small spiders, no they were HUGE.  I only got through one leg before stopping!  

After the market, we headed back on our Tuk-Tuks for a shower and dinner at the hotel.  Both very lovely.  We talked about the upcoming events for the next week and a half and I am SO excited for it all…however, I am so exhausted, I cannot even show my excitement…eyes are slowly closing and so with that, I say good night.  Pictures of the day to come…I am just too tired to post them now.  

Until tomorrow,

Jessica

….And I am completely unprepared.  I still have to shop, make phone calls (which might have to occur Monday morning), pack, do laundry, blah blah blah.  And in the midst, I have a paper to write.  Gross.  Finals wore me out and so here is to last minute packing and shopping.  Tomorrow is going to be one blur of a day!

However, I cannot WAIT for Monday to roll around!!  Flight leaves at 12:30 from LAX!  I am so incredibly excited you have no idea!

I am hoping that I can get internet there so I can update this…

I abhor packing.  I will wait until the very last minute to pack for a trip and then I a) over-pack and b) obsess over the idea that I may (though due to the over-packing, is highly unlikely) have forgotten something.

Packing causes me such anxiety, I literally dread it.  And in my travels to Cambodia, my bags (meaning all luggage) can only weigh 44 pounds.  This is going to be interesting to say the least!  

Cambodia :)

Going on a trip with a good friend through my school to give a lecture, visit orphanages and explore the country of Cambodia for two weeks.

I am so excited!